Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Take me out in the crowd

I hate to scoop the Big Man... but, I'm gonna.

Things that go through your head when a ballplayer loses his grip on his bat:

Whoahhhh, that's not good.
Hey, it's coming this way.
Oh crap, it's coming right here!
Duck!
((you know, if I jumped up I bet I could...))
DIE. You could DIE. Duck down further.
You're not ducking deep enough.
BANG!
Is it gonna bounce my way?
Is anybody hurt?

So... how are you scoring that one?


Nobody was hurt; some kid got an awesome souvenir. If it's an option, I'd prefer to go the rest of my life without the little voice in my head saying "you're not ducking deep enough" ever again.

7 Comments:

Anonymous michael said...

This from the guy who hits the ground when he hears someone rattling keys?

9:47 PM, July 26, 2006  
Blogger Mick said...

Whether you duck, or not, it will come. Sometimes ducking is the wrong thing, sometimes jumping the wrong thing. As Philip Marlowe said,

"You were dead, you were sleeping the big sleep, you were not bothered by things like that, oil and water were the same as wind and air to you. You just slept the big sleep, not caring about the nastiness of how you died or where you fell."

Baseball bats and little pistols, both dangerous.

10:50 PM, July 26, 2006  
Blogger Joe said...

Alison points out that the lyric is "take me out to the crowd." However, I was already in the crowd when Elijah Dukes of the Louisville Bats tried to take me out.

[FoghornLeghorn] It's a joke, son! [/FoghornLeghorn]

(Alison will probably point out that she was sitting right next to me and Dukes might just as well have been gunning for her.)

11:15 PM, July 26, 2006  
Blogger John B. said...

I have caught two foul balls (one at a major league game, one at a minor league game) that came my way on line drves, but in all of my travels to ballparks, I have never had a bat come my way!

I never duck foul balls (I had quick enough hands to field baseballs pretty well up through high school)...but I would definitely duck a bat...too hard to handle.

8:45 AM, July 27, 2006  
Blogger TeacherRefPoet said...

Joe,

Elijah Dukes is a Durham Bull, not a Louisville Bat.

And man, did that scare the crap out of me. I never really thought it was terribly close to us, but still, the adrenaline really gets cooking...

10:35 AM, July 27, 2006  
Blogger lemming said...

The lyric also has to be "Crackerjack" and not "Crackerjacks" in order to preserve the rhyme.

3:05 PM, July 27, 2006  
Blogger TeacherRefPoet said...

Indeed, the wife whales on me when I pluaralize "Crackerjack" in the song. Which, alas, I do habitually.

12:14 AM, July 28, 2006  

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