Loose talk in the classroom
(Also the Olsen Twins, but that joke's just too easy. And still, eww.)
On the other hand,
Ashton Kutcher : Demi Moore :: Joe : Christie Brinkley.
Well, she is the Uptown Girl, but Billy Joel's my boy. Then again...
AK : DM :: Joe : Ellen Barkin.
Oh my Lord, Ellen Barkin. Two words: Buckaroo Banzai. Three more words: The Big Easy. Where's that laminated list?
You go, Ashton. You go. Live the dream.